For the third time in four years I have had to replace my mailbox because someone hit it with their automobile. On only one occasion did the the culprit own up and pay for the repairs. I have been pondering the design of roadside mailboxes that might be resistant to these attacks.
The Rambo
The box itself is constructed of 1/8" steel plate and mounted within a cage and post of welded 1/2" rebar set in 3" of concrete. The front of the cage features two barbed spikes guaranteed to rip the side off any vehicle delivering a glancing blow. Any bending due to a full frontal attack will be barely discernible.
The Rambo Delux
Same as the Rambo but featuring a semicircular array of steel spikes 3" above the ground to take out tires also. This model features an optional top-mounted flashing red beacon.
The Trailer Park
A 3-foot pile of truck tires filled with concrete topped with a Rambo-style mailbox. Tires can optionally be painted with reflective paint. This model may not meet the aesthetic standards of some neighborhoods.
The Wussy
Hi-impact plastic mailbox is mounted on a post made of 4" Lego blocks. Upon impact the entire thing separates, but can easily be reassembled by one of your kids.
